It’s derivative as hell, but the needle on my Creepy Sleaze-o-Meter just broke off!

After my parents got divorced, my family moved into government housing. I’ve seen it in recent years, and the area has become a snakepit–grassless playgrounds, weedy shrubbery, and a palpable sense of danger and crime now surrounds the area. However, way back in the early 1980s, it was new, clean, and, most importantly, hopeful for those living under the poverty line.

One of the greatest things about living there was that we had HBO for the first year or so. Our previous apartment had sported a slightly-illegal Showtime hook-up (bonus!), but this was the first time we’d partaken in the American ritual that was Home Box Office. 

I was a new horror hound at the time, and even back then it was tough to scare me. However, a fateful late night in the autumn of 1983 offered up one of the first showings of AMITYVILLE II: THE POSSESSION, and it’s arguably the most scared I’ve ever been watching a horror film. 

Backpedaling from the original, director Damiano Damiani instead opts for the ‘prequel’ route. Using Hans Holzer’s 1979 book “Murder in Amityville” as a template, the sequel attempts to show us why the house got so jacked up to begin with, and let me tell ya, it’s a doozy of a story. In a nutshell, a combative Italian-American family (is that redundant?) moves into the ominous Long Island house with the quarter-moon windows, only to see its oldest son slowly succumb to demonic possession. He screws his sister and then cusses her out for good measure, hears murderous commands from the devil on his Sony Walkman, and starts a series of physical metamorphoses that really, really look like they got lifted directly from earlier films like THE BEAST WITHIN and…hmm, THE EXORCIST (surprise!). All that ain’t nothin’, though, as the film climaxes with the kid mowing down his father, mother, and three younger siblings at close range with a rifle. Fucking hell!!! 

One wonders what co-writer Tommy Lee Wallace was trying to say here. Sure, the frequent John Carpenter collaborator and director of such hotly-debated horror entries as HALLOWEEN III: SEASON OF THE WITCH and the 1990 television adaptation of Stephen King’s IT is no stranger to horror craziness. Having said that, AMITYVILLE II: THE POSSESSION, with its depictions of spousal and child abuse, blasphemy, incest, and graphic violence, was totally off the hook for an early 1980s offering from a major studio. The even more amazing thing? The original cut of the film was supposed to include a more explicit incest scene, as well as a separate anal rape sequence that was eliminated only after test audiences reportedly flipped out. *blink, blink* All y’all motherfuckers need Jesus! 

Ultimately, a spate of tepid reviews, competing genre titles, and reigning box office juggernauts from the summer of 1982 staved off any chances for the movie to make a serious dent in the marketplace. Much like John Carpenter’s THE THING, which was released and immediately floundered just three months earlier, AMITYVILLE II was probably just too much for audiences back in the day. 

In the end, though, I couldn’t care less about Leonard Maltin’s “BOMB” rating. I love this chaotic sleazefest as much now as I did when I was traumatized by it at age nine. It will forever stand tall as the most entertaining–and most daring!–Amityville film of them all. 

#unclean&unseen #amityvilleIIthepossession #damianodamiani #tommyleewallace #halloweeniiiseasonofthewitch #it #johncarpenter #thething #thebeastwithin #theexorcist #incest #hansholzer #murderinamityville #leonardmaltin 

“Where a kid can be a kid!” And a serial killer, too, obviously.

We’re going to kick your week off with giggle. A good friend of mine in Wisconsin posted this recently, and I was actually kind of disappointed it took all of us THIS long to crack this joke. Come on, it was just sitting there in front of our faces the whole time!!

Say what you will about Chuck E. Cheese, but they’re the ONLY goddamn thing left at my local mall. Take that, e-commerce!

#killermemes&comics #chucky #childsplay #chuckecheese

Eventually, you have to wake up from the dream, bitch.

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 5: THE DREAM CHILD is generally seen as the first serious misstep in the franchise. As alluded to in this AP article from the summer of 1989, the sequel took it in the shorts in the wake of Freddy’s media overexposure at the time. Netting only $22 million domestically, the film earned less than half of Krueger’s tasty take for DREAM WARRIORS ($45 million) or THE DREAM MASTER ($50 million).

Here, Robert Englund’s spidey sense is tingling, urging him in other directions that would allow him to do other films like the remake of THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA, the unjustly-maligned Andrew Dice Clay vehicle THE ADVENTURES OF FORD FAIRLANE, and Tobe Hooper’s adaptation of Stephen King’s short story THE MANGLER. However, none of those films did anything to sway the public from his iconic portrayal of the Bastard Son of a Hundred Maniacs.

#fearflashbacks #anightmareonelmstreet5thedreamchild #boxoffice #robertenglund #freddykrueger #thephantomoftheopera #theadventuresoffordfairlane #themangler #andrewdiceclay #tobehooper

Forget about Bambi and Winnie the Pooh! This time, resident whacko Rhys Frake-Waterfield is gonna torpedo your last bit of childhood nostalgia by turning the Boy Who Wouldn’t Grow Up into a terrifying fiend!

With reports of Tinkerbell flying high on heroin, as well as an ‘evil Peter Pan’ abducting Wendy’s little brother, Michael, you can only imagine the damage kids are going to suffer if they catch their parents streaming this one!

Batten down the hatches when director Scott Jeffrey’s PETER PAN’S NEVERLAND NIGHTMARE flies in through your bedroom window in 2025! For now, hit up UpcomingHorrorMovies.com to check out some more details, including pics and preliminary artwork.

#horrorhappenings #peterpansneverlandnightmare #scottjeffrey #rhysfrakewaterfield #winniethepoohbloodandhoney #bambithereckoning

Or: “How to Build a Better Zombie…”

Though Canadian anthropologist and researcher Wade Davis could never be labeled a horror writer, his controversial release “The Serpent and the Rainbow” posed a provocative and terrifying question. 

We all know from the collective works of folks like George A. Romero, Peter Jackson, and Lucio Fulci, zombies pop up at the damnedest times, but Wade’s non-fiction bestseller did a deep-dive into Haitian voodoo to find out if there was a pharmacological “recipe” for creating a zombie. 

The book presents the case of a modern Haitian man who spent two years as a ‘zombie’. The reason for this seemed to be a crash-up of culture, religion, and poisons, specifically the hallucinogenic datura and a potent homemade cocktail of tetrodotoxin, which contained such lovely ingredients as puffer fish, baby skulls, and various reptile bits. You can’t ever say those voodoo priests aren’t imaginative.

Naturally, the trance-like zombification Wade proposed attracted attention of supporters and detractors alike, but the science ultimately got lost in the sensationalism when Wes Craven unleashed the 1988 film adaptation of the same name. With its fiery rituals, nightmarish visuals, and enough behind-the-scenes strife to move the production from Haiti to the Dominican Republic less than two weeks into filming, Craven’s film ultimately eclipsed Davis’ original proposal. 

Offering up a intriguing and perplexing look at the possibility of the science of the living controlling the magic of the dead, “The Serpent and the Rainbow” still stands as required reading for zombie completists.

#boundhorror #theserpentandtherainbow #wadedavis #zombies #tetrodotoxin #datura #voodoo #haiti #nonfiction #wescraven #georgeromero #peterjackson #luciofulci

For those not in the know, Chas. Balun was a premier horror journalist back in the 1980s and 1990s. His insightful and sometimes hilarious articles in Fangoria and Gorezone overflowed with a jubilant love of the genre, but he never shied away from ripping on the latest pile of shit that was undeservedly raking in $40 million at the box office. Chas. was one of us.

In addition to his horror critiques, I saw him appear on television a number of times to debate the merits of the genre for mainstream talk shows and news exposés. By the early 1990s, he was ready to move into the area of horror fiction. Today’s entry is a promo flyer from circa late 1988 announcing the arrival of what was to be his only novel, “Ninth and Hell Street”, published by Fantaco in 1990 (not 1989 as the advert originally estimated).

After contributing so much to horror criticism, Balun was taken from us far too soon, dying of cancer in 2009 at the age of 61. However, his gutsy, informative work will live on for new generations to discover. Even the beginnings of UBHB drew inspiration from his work, in particular his Gorezone “Piece O’ Mind” column. If you like my writing, definitely do yourself a favor and check out Chas.

#fearflashbacks #chasblaun #ninthandhellstreet #fangoria #gorezone #journalism #pieceomind #fantaco

Has it been a year already? The folks over at Shudder just don’t know when to say when, so get ready for the latest installment in the V/H/S franchise!

But wait, this time there’s a twist…

V/H/S BEYOND promises to serve up SIX episodes this time, which is music to my ears. I’ve seen every one of these anthologies, and a common complaint I have with them is that some of the segments stretch on longer than they should. This time, there’s a good chance we’re going to get some lean and mean entries. Be there on October 4th when the popular anthology series explores the starry outer regions of sci-fi this time around.

Alright, Shudder, I surrender. Let’s do this! Check out the trailer here.

#horrorhappenings #vhsbeyond #shudder #scifi #trailer

You ever wonder why the original FRIDAY THE 13th got an intricate poster, but its first rockin’ sequel was saddled with a seemingly incomplete thought for its one-sheet?

Turns out, there WAS another neat and very detailed poster intended for Steve Miner’s slasher classic! Purportedly, the powers that be thought it gave away too much of Jason’s look, and they wanted to keep that under wraps for audiences to see for themselves.

Whether or not that’s true, this take by Spiros Angelikas aligns pretty damn well with the Alex Ebel artwork that became so synonymous with the 1980 original. It’s great that Angelika’s work has found the light of day in recent years and can finally be appreciated by fans.

#onesheetwonders #fridaythe13thpart2 #steveminer #spirosangelikas #alexebel #alternate #artwork

A dark, icy evening in late 1983 was the perfect time for such a cold and calculating film.

Sure, JAWS was my first horror experience in the theater, but I was a toddler and fell asleep. (I did this two years later at STAR WARS, too!) By default, THE DEAD ZONE gets the honor for my first moviegoing experience to see a horror film. 

There was little triplex cinema on the main drag in Johnstown, PA in the early 1980s. I remember it being wonderfully creepy and barren in the winter months after the adjacent department store had closed for the day. Even all those years ago, the place had already seemed forgotten, existing in the margins of reality just like most all the best movie memories. 

My dad, who never seemed interested in horror films, was suddenly jazzed to see the latest adaptation of a Stephen King bestseller. The previous novel-to-screen offering from King, CUJO, had mauled its way to a modest $20 million payday a few months earlier, but THE DEAD ZONE was a whole other breed–an outlier in King’s oeuvre even back then, serving as a quiet accompaniment to the likes of the horror meister’s amped-up classics such as “The Shining” and “Carrie”. 

I had just recently gotten interested in horror films, and so the name David Cronenberg had flashed before me a few times in magazines and such, mostly in conjunction with his earlier film, the prescient and criminally underrated VIDEODROME (1983). So, as my dad’s Fiat slid down the hill to the parking lot fronting that shadowy, unassuming theater, I didn’t really know much about what to expect. 

Teacher Johnny Smith (played by Christopher Walken at his most Christopher Walken-like perfection) is the victim of a snowy car crash, awakening from a five-year coma only to have the blessing/curse of second sight. It’s not bad enough his girlfriend has moved on without him as he lay comatose in that hospital bed, but now, with the touch of his hand, he’s able to divinate a person’s future, and sometimes these visions are downright horrifying. The worst is when he shakes the hand of up-and-coming politician Greg Stillson (the always-intense Martin Sheen). Images of the future president Stillson ordering a nuclear strike shakes Smith to his core, until he decides the only way to avert this terrible fate is to assassinate him.

This is a thinking man’s terror, rife with moral dilemmas and political intrigues that are just as relevant now as when King first proposed them in 1979. I could say that THE DEAD ZONE is a horror film for people who don’t like horror films, but the same could be said for the film’s director, David Cronenberg. For a filmmaker who rose to fame by almost single-handedly establishing the ‘body horror’ subgenre that has enjoyed a resurgence in recent years, this is a curiously astute work for folks who would typically shy away from Cronenberg’s aggressively grotesque style. 

Well…except for that scissors scene. Trust me, you’ll know it when you see it.

#letsallgotothelobbytogetourselvessomemeat #thedeadzone #davidcronenberg #stephenking #christopherwalken #martinsheen #cujo #carrie #theshining #videodrome #johnstown #pennsylvania #jaws #starwars #bodyhorror

Renny Harlin’s PRISON was a fun curiosity for horror fiends to sniff out after snagging a fuck-ton of coverage in Fangoria. Though the film didn’t set the box office on fire, and it’s just as obscure in mainstream genre circles these days as it was during the VHS boom, it nevertheless served as the jumping-off point for two big-budget franchise sequels the following year.

Effects supervisor John Carl Buechler would hire the film’s co-star and stuntman, Kane Hodder, to fill Jason Voorhees’ muddy boots when he went on to direct FRIDAY THE 13th PART VII: THE NEW BLOOD. Meanwhile, Harlin’s direction got enough attention to land the plum opportunity to helm Freddy Krueger’s third sequel, A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4: THE DREAM MASTER. Both films were box office hits during the spring and summer of 1988, respectively.

From Fangoria Poster Magazine (I think?…I’m old now, so my memory ain’t what it used to be)

#onesheetwonders #prison #rennyharlin #kanehodder #johncarlbuechler #fangoria #fridaythe13thpartviithenewblood #anightmareonelmstreet4thedreammaster