When there’s no more room in hell, the rip-offs will walk the earth.

Also known as: Night of the Zombies, Virus, Cannibal Virus, Zombies A-Poppin’, Zombie 2, Zombie Inferno, Zombie Disco Inferno: Electric Boogaloo, Zombie Creeping Flesh, Undead Combo Meal with Large Fries, Zombies of the Savanna, The Artists Formerly Known as Zombies, and many, many others.

As adults, we pride ourselves on wisdom. Getting through the highs and lows of life gives us insight we can use to offer needed advice to our loved ones and make intelligent decisions. Then, there are decisions like HELL OF THE LIVING DEAD, which we just know are going to be bad for us. That cigarette. That skanky one-night stand in Vegas. Those two packages of Girl Scout cookies that are just sitting there, taunting us. But we can’t resist. 

I originally intended to see this shit carnival one night on cable in 1984 under its US-branded moniker, UNENDING NIGHT OF THE DEADLY FLESH NIBBLERS, but my mum came to her senses and sent me to bed. (Had it not been a school night, I bet I could have pulled it off.) It took me another decade to finally catch it on video, and boy howdy, was it worth the wait. 

The movie almost seems like it was made by actual zombies. Its genius-by-accident mix of inexplicable nudity, bad dialogue, and non-stop, dollar-store gore inadvertently becomes the very definition of ‘guilty pleasure’. From the ripped off Goblin soundtrack to director Bruno Mattei being billed as “Vincent Dawn”, the producers of HELLISH DAY OF THE DISGRUNTLED WHATEVERS use every trick in the book to convince us this maybe, just possibly, could be the work of George A. Romero. 

Needless to say, it’s a total failure, but once you feast your eyes on BURNING HOPPING ZOMBIES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH, you have to admit that these folks packed a lot of irresistible nonsense into 100 minutes of running time. In all honesty, I’ve probably seen this film at least six times, and I still don’t know what happens in it or what the point is! (Off the record: booze and drugs will help, so be sure to have a lot nearby before you press play.)

Just like that greasy chili burger you have after four oyster shooters, watching DAWNING SCREAMING ZOMBIES ON SAFARI is not going to be one of the best choices you’ll make in this lifetime. But sometimes, you just have to do it. 

#unclean&unseen #hellofthelivingdead #nightofthezombies #vincentdawn #brunomattei #georgeromero #zombies

Even 25 years after its release, THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT remains one of the most divisive horror films in history. Some moviegoers applauded its keen marketing attack and lo-fi scares, while others saw it as a nausea-inducing shakycam bore.

Over the years, I’m sure fans and detractors alike have wondered what happened to the film’s stars, Heather Donahue, Joshua Leonard, and Michael C. Williams. Well, it seems that they were very candid with Variety lately, outlining some contract fuckery that transpired all those years ago. Judging from the comments sections on all the AP reprints across the internet this past weekend, this is shaping up to be as divisive a story as the original film itself.

Make up your own mind by checking out Variety’s original story here.

#horrorhappenings #theblairwitchproject #25thanniversary #heatherdonahue #joshualeonard #michaelcwilliams #variety

Meeting a genre pioneer ain’t easy, especially when you have no idea what he looks like.

With many of his films seeming to be a whacky crash-up of monster movies and black-comedy slapstick, it’s fitting the New Jersey-born Joe Dante started out with working for Roger Corman at New World Pictures. Even some of the director’s earliest works such as PIRANHA (1978) and THE HOWLING (1981) align perfectly with Corman’s zesty, low-budget take on drive-in perfection. 

Turning some tidy profits by the early 1980s, Dante earned enough box office clout to garner notice from Warner Bros. First, he gave a ghastly new spin to “It’s A Good Life” for TWILIGHT ZONE: THE MOVIE (1983) before the studio offered him the plum chance to finally command a bigger budget. The result was GREMLINS (1984), an out-of-the-box summer blockbuster that made everyone (even yours truly) suddenly decide they needed a mogwai in their lives–and yes, I still have mine.

I know a lot of younger people won’t get this, but there was a time when we as moviegoers had no idea what directors looked like. You’d read articles in newspapers or magazines about an exciting new genre film but never once catch a glimpse of anyone outside the principal actors. Keeping that in mind, you can understand my surprise when I met Joe Dante by accident. 

Let me explain. 

In the late 80’s, I was a gawky teen attending my first horror convention. It was like Disneyland for disenfranchised nerds so, naturally, I was in my element and totally in awe of everything. One of the first stops I made was at a table that was reserved for Gary Brandner, author of “The Howling”. Having seen the film, I thought Brandner would be a neat person to meet. Soon after, a man sat down at the table and, with not a single other nerd in sight, I was able to easily stroll up and ask for an autograph. He was very kind and asked my name before jotting for me “To Dylan from Joe Dante” before drawing a quick and surprisingly accurate mogwai beside which he added, “ + Gizmo”. My mouth dropped open when I realized the switcheroo. Not only was this instead the director of THE HOWLING, but also the first time I had ever seen him. 

And with that, Joe Dante inadvertently became the first movie director I ever met. Not a bad start, eh? 

#horrorhonorrole #joedante #garybrandner #gremlins #thehowling #piranha #rogercorman #newjersey #newworldpictures #warnerbros 

You didn’t think I’d let June 13th go by without posting something about FRIDAY THE 13th, did you?

Today brings us a nice little coincidence. This is an old clipping, circa 1987, from a Los Angeles newspaper giving a short bio about Lauren-Marie Taylor. Yeah, you know–Vickie from FRIDAY THE 13th PART 2 (1981) and Sheila from GIRLS NITE OUT (1982)!

The Bronx native has come of out acting retirement in recent years, returning to her roots by making appearances in fan films like FRIDAY THE 13th: NINE LIVES and NEVER HIKE ALONE 2. Well, spank my ass and call me Sally! It turns out, she also has a cameo in the much ballyhooed IN A VIOLENT NATURE, which is in theatres *now*. Yes, right now!

#fearflashbacks #laurenmarietaylor #fridaythe13thpart2 #fridaythe13thninelives #neverhikealone2 #inaviolentnature #girlsniteout

Okay, I’m just gonna spill it: I dig Oz Perkins. What I’ve seen of his so far has been impressive. I’M THE PRETTY THING THAT LIVES IN THE HOUSE (2016) was a neat little creep fest, and my personal favorite, the nuanced and drenched-in-evil THE BLACKCOAT’S DAUGHTER (2015) was so good I bought the DVD right after I finished watching it.

Therefore, his upcoming LONGLEGS, in which Nicolas Cage stars as the titular serial killer, is one I’m bustin’ my stitches waiting for. Though it won’t be released until July 12th, it’s tough not to be excited–the earliest reviews have been ridiculously positive, but I’m trying not to put too much stock in them.

In the meantime, you can judge for yourself by checking out the latest trailer here.

#horrorhappenings #longlegs #ozperkins #osgoodperkins #theblackcoatsdaughter #imtheprettythingthatlivesinthehouse #nicolascage

A dreamy, demanding puzzle only for the most dedicated. 

Before you decipher the nightmarish, time-jumping ENYS MEN, you’d have no idea why I have pangs of guilt calling it a historical horror film. To do so seems almost like a spoiler.

The world’s first Cornish folk horror film, ENYS MEN – meaning ‘stone island’ and pronounced “Ennis Main”– is shot in 16mm and stained with a fitting 1970s patina by director Mark Jenkin. It seems predictable at first glance, almost coma-inducing in its monotony. A middle-aged woman, known only as The Volunteer, slavishly chronicles a small clutch of flowers native to a remote island off the English coast. Days of solitude go by, the flowers remain the same, and she neatly logs the stupefying lack of details in her journal. Holy shit, if they keep this up, then I’m off for another Guinness and a piss!

But wait, don’t unzip just yet! One day, the flowers start to change. That’s when ENYS MEN, too, begins to bend and bloom into something much more chilling, lush, and complex. Who is The Volunteer? What the hell is the significance of the standing stone that looms on the hilltop? More characters than you would expect–some real, some specters–float in and out, barely tethered by time or circumstance. Jenkin makes us work for our answers, continually blurring reality while bringing perceived fantasies into sharp, alarming focus. 

If you’re looking for mainstream thrills that offer simple solutions, a wise Englishman once said, “Get knotted, you rotter!” However, for fans of more cerebral genre offerings like CUBE or Alex Garland’s ANNIHILATION, there’s a small island with a big puzzle waiting for you.

#historicalhorror #enysmen #markjenkin #folkhorror #cornwall #england #cube #annihiliation #alexgarland

Back in the day, it was neat to witness Stephen King fully earn his title as the “king of horror” with the release of his magnum opus, “It”.

With the news that Bill Skarsgard will bust out his red balloons again as Pennywise for Max’s upcoming prequel, WELCOME TO DERRY, I thought it would be a good time to post this article I saved from the L.A. Daily News in November 1986.

Four decades on, it’s downright quaint to find these kinds of things, especially when they’re full of speculation regarding “It” possibly being King’s last horror novel. (spoiler: it ain’t)

Just for shits and giggles, though, one can’t help but wonder what Stephen King’s reputation would be had he retired by the ripe ol’ age of 40. To be honest, I probably would have done it. I mean, the average person could get by on the royalties from all those goddamn CHILDREN OF THE CORN sequels alone.

#fearflashbacks #stephenking #it #retirement #ladailynews #1986 #horrorfiction #billskarsgard #welcometoderry #max

Despite script and editing problems, “Hellbound: Hellraiser II” is a labyrinthine nightmare that ups the ante from Clive Barker’s original.

1987 was a watershed for the horror genre. From the gigglin’ ghouls of EVIL DEAD 2: DEAD BY DAWN to Alan Parker’s pitch-perfect voodoo nightmare ANGEL HEART or the grimy Brooklyn tenements of Jim Muro’s audacious STREET TRASH, the year raised the bar and eyebrows alike in the thick of the VHS boom. 

They say good things never last, and holy shit did 1988 prove that. I nearly punched a wall after paying good money to see the latest Jason and Freddy outings that summer. The latest crop of cheap, direct-to-video shockers hadn’t helped matters, either. 

That autumn, I had moved back to the Rust Belt from California. My family had gone broke after my single mother was caught in a 26-car pile-up on a Los Angeles freeway. The lack of friends, interests, and daylight as the year wound down injected an unshakable, sinking feeling in the stomach of yet another faceless American teenager living below the poverty line. 

I had one hail mary left: the first sequel to Clive Barker’s low-budget debut hit, HELLRAISER. My choice to trudge through the post-Christmas slush to take in the continuing adventures of the Cenobites–Hell’s bounty hunters with a taste for S&M–turned out to be a revelation. Four decades on, HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II remains my favorite of the series, which has since imploded on itself in a orgy of subpar video-only releases. 

As the final flash in the embers of 1988, HELLBOUND emerged as a deliciously vulgar and daring continuation that picks up where Barker’s original left off. With the help of a young mute girl with a penchant for puzzles, Kirsty Cotton must square off against the labyrinthine tricks of Hell to save her poor father’s soul. 

The film suffered from typical editing and script wrinkles, a few of which are ironed out by the longer, ‘unrated’ version that now serves as the default edition in most countries. Reactions at the time from both critics and horror fans were mixed, as Barker had opted out of helming the sequel, working instead on the ill-fated screen adaptation of “Cabal”, later retitled NIGHTBREED.

Ultimately, the tantalizing mix of redemption and revenge from late director Anthony Hickox and his crack team of SFX wizards was enough to restore my faith in the genre after quite a rocky year. More importantly, HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II still serves as one of horror’s last gory hurrahs of the 1980s. 

#letsallgotothelobbytogetourselvessomemeat #hellboundhellraiserII #anthonyhickox #cenobites #clivebarker #cabal #nightbreed #jimmuro #streettrash #alanparker #angelheart #evildead2

It only comes once a year–it’s “Omen Day”! Yes, June 6th (at 6am local time!) is when it’s time to give thanks for THE OMEN franchise.

This probably isn’t a good time to admit that I haven’t yet seen the latest entry, THE FIRST OMEN, but I got a copy of it and I just need to find some time to squeeze it into my schedule. (Hopefully, tonight’s the night!) Until I get my proverbial shit together, I’m offering today’s post as penance. It’s an advert I saved from the mid-80s when THE OMEN premiered on KTLA in Los Angeles!

And for all you lightweights out there: viewer discretion is advised, bitches!

#fearflashbacks #theomen #omenday #666 #KTLA #thefirstomen

Just a short ‘n’ sleazy pit stop to highlight horror posters, new and old.

We finally got a poster for Fede Alvarez’s ALIEN: ROMULUS, which drops on August 16th.

Whatcha think of this one? I can’t really say it’s bad, but I wish it would’ve been less…predictable. In any case, I’m hoping for good things. I have to admit, with the exception of the sublime ALIENS (1986), I’ve never been a huge fan of the franchise, but I’m kind of psyched to check this one out. Only about ten more weeks to go!…

#onesheetwonders #alienromulus #ridleyscott #scifi