So much going on in the world of horror lately! In addition to eagerly-anticipated offerings such as MAXXXINE, LONGLEGS, ALIEN: ROMULUS, and TERRIFIER 3, we can now throw Robert Eggers’ reworking of NOSFERATU onto the upcoming horror heap!

Like many modern horror directors, Eggers is hit and miss for me, but this looks like it has a lot of promise. Bill Skarsgard headlines as the creepy, obsessed Count Orlok. Lily-Rose Depp and Willem Dafoe (the star of Eggers’ previous genre offering, THE LIGHTHOUSE) pull co-star duties in this lush reboot of the 1922 classic.

‘Tis the season for a gothic good time when NOSFERATU opens December 25th. Catch the first teaser trailer here.

#horrorhappenings #nosferatu #roberteggers #billskarsgard #willemdafoe #lilyrosedepp #teasertrailer

Though its script could have used one more draft, and it’s aching for a sequel we never got, “Tucker and Dale vs. Evil” still stands as the most charming horror-comedy of its time.

For the young ones just joining us, “Occupy Wall Street” was a short-lived social movement that swept the US during the fall of 2011. It decried corporate avarice, economic inequality, the evils of monopolies, and, in particular, the CEOs who hold dear all these transgressions. Hey, I couldn’t really disagree with this new crop of social justice warriors, as most of their points were well-intentioned and insightful.

Just don’t stand between me and the movie I’ve waited all year to see. 

The scene was downtown Bellingham, Washington, a tree-huggin’, left-leanin’ college town a hour or two north of Seattle. Chanting demonstrators bounced off the bumper of my pickup truck as I carved my way through the crowd. After finally securing a parking spot and getting inside the theater, I found myself all alone–it turns out I was literally the first person in town to check out Eli Craig’s feature debut, TUCKER AND DALE VS. EVIL.

And all those protestor handprints and bloodstains on my fenders were worth it. 

Tucker and Dale are a couple of simple, fun-loving West Virginia hicks looking to spend some time sprucing up their dilapidated cabin. Just think of them as Beavis and Butt-Head in bib overalls, only with fishing tackle in tow and sporting 20 more IQ points, give or take. When some college kids roll into their neck of the woods to party, things start to go south real quick. Before you can say ‘mistaken identity’, poor Tucker and Dale find themselves hip-waders deep in problems as the collegiates begin to bite the dust in a string of hilariously gory FINAL DESTINATION-style mishaps. 

Whether it’s Tucker trying to mastermind a way out of their mess, or the adorable-but-self-conscious Dale trying to hit on a hottie without scaring the piss out of her, TUCKER AND DALE VS. EVIL puts a fresh spin on that familiar sitcom schtick of people reacting to one half of a story without bothering to hear the second half. With help from the likable Katrina Bowden as Dale’s prospective girlfriend/hostage victim, the film is a powder keg of laughs fueled by some admirable interplay between Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine as the titular duo who just can’t stay out of trouble.

Without further ado, grab yourself a Pabst Blue Ribbon and ride along with what might be the most charming horror-comedy you’ll ever see. In the end, Tucker is certainly correct in his assessment: It’s a doozy of a day!

#letsallgotothelobbytogetourselvessomemeat #tuckeranddalevsevil #elicraig #alantudyk #tylerlabine #katrinabowden #horrorcomedies #occupywallstreet #finaldestination #beavisandbutthead #pabstblueribbon #westvirginia #bellingham #washington

Forty years of playing a crispy dream demon pays off, folks.

The fine folks at Fango reported yesterday that Robert Englund, the original Freddy Krueger himself, will soon be getting a star on Hollywood’s Walk of Fame. Englund has been a genre touchstone for nearly 50 years, with early roles in Tobe Hooper’s EATEN ALIVE (1976), GALAXY OF TERROR (1981), and the NBC miniseries “V” (1983) before becoming everyone’s favorite sleep stalker in Wes Craven’s A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (1984).

Joining Englund in the class of 2025 will be the one and only horror director, John Carpenter. Between HALLOWEEN, THE THING, THE FOG, and countless other contributions to the genre over the past half century, Carpenter remains one of the most emulated, reviled, celebrated, and confounding characters on the horror circuit. It’s good to see him finally get some of the recognition he’s deserved for so many years.

Congrats, guys. You’ve earned it!

Check out Fangoria’s original story here.

#horrorhappenings #robertenglund #johncarpenter #eatenalive #galaxyofterror #v #anightmareonelmstreet #halloween #thething #thefog #hollywoodwalkoffame

Just a short ‘n’ sleazy pit stop to highlight horror posters, new and old.

Gettin’ a-head from Herbert West. Where was this guy when we needed him during the COVID-19 pandemic?

From Fangoria Poster Magazine #1 (1987)

#onesheetwonders #reanimator #herbertwest #jeffreycombs #fangoria

Quite simply, the pinnacle of syndicated scares in the 1980s.

We’re kicking off this new television-based segment right. I’ve been looking forward to writing this entry for days now, simply because it’s my choice for the best episode from my favorite show of all time, TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE.

After George A. Romero had a minor mainstream hit with CREEPSHOW in late 1982, the idea of adapting it for television suddenly became quite a lucrative possibility. Upon a slight retooling of the concept, a pilot aired in 1983 before the series was picked up by LBS Communications for syndication the following autumn. It stuck with the familiar anthology style of many genre series before it, most notably Rod Serling’s two network success stories, THE TWILIGHT ZONE and NIGHT GALLERY. 

The series was filmed on the cheap by a non-union crew at alternating makeshift soundstages–one in an abandoned mattress factory in East L.A. and the other 3,000 miles away in Long Island City, which had formerly served as a rehearsal haunt for Pink Floyd. Leveraging this rather unorthodox method, the po’ ass producers could stretch their paltry, $124,000-per-episode budget by prepping one facility while filming at the other. 

TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE achieved a handful of classic episodes in its first two seasons to include “Distant Signals”, in which an intergalactic audience demands the continuation of a long-canceled television show, as well as “Inside the Closet”, the monstrously auspicious directorial debut of FX guru Tom Savini. For my money, though, the pinnacle of the series happened right before Halloween, 1986. 

Little Audrey is gifted a dollhouse by her friendly Uncle Richard. Audrey’s parents, Sam and Edith, are at first too busy trading their usual feckless mix of pleasantries and insults to notice that there’s something…really weird about the dolls, which Audrey has dubbed “The Geezenstacks” and that quaintly resemble each of the story’s four main players. 

Enchanted by her offbeat new gift, Audrey’s imagination is quick to whip up tons of new adventures for her dolls. Mrs. Geezenstack indulges in the purchase of a new coat…and then Edith comes home moments later with the exact same thing. When Mr. Geezenstack comes down with a cold, Sam is soon laid up in bed and stuffed full of chicken soup. What is dismissed as pure coincidence by Edith and Richard becomes Sam’s very unhealthy obsession. Where did the dolls come from? Why do they resemble his family? And, most importantly, what will happen to them next? 

“The Geezenstacks” is one of the premier examples of TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE thriving in the shadows of its low budget. Director Bill Travis’s spare lighting and odd, inspired blocking help make the episode’s string-based score all the more sinister and atmospheric. Bonus points go to star Craig Wasson, who would soon go on to tangle with Freddy Krueger in A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: DREAM WARRIORS. Here, he admirably walks the crooked line between goofy and tortured as a father slowly losing his marbles to playthings that seem all at once evil and harmless.  

Ultimately, one of the best things about the episode is something you can’t fully appreciate until you read its source material, a 1943 short story of the same name by Fredric Brown. Whereas Brown opted to give his readers a chaotic, somewhat confusing shock ending, the adapted teleplay by Nancy Doyne layers on a positively chilling and well-rounded conclusion that insinuates the dollhouse’s story is far from over. 

With their porcelain skin, mute smiles, and jet-black eyes that just might be able to see the future, “The Geezenstacks” will give fans of old-school horror and fantasy some of the biggest goosebumps they’ll have all year. 

#smallscreenscreams #talesfromthedarkside #thegeezenstacks #fredricbrown #nancydoyne #craigwasson #georgeromero #tomsavini #pinkfloyd #creepshow #lbscommunications #rodserling #twilightzone #nightgallery

This summer marks 40 years of Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers. But, as Marge Simpson once said, “Of course you’ll have a bad impression of New York if you only focus on the pimps and the C.H.U.D.s!”

From Media Home Entertainment flyer, circa mid-1980s.

#fearflashbacks #chud #thesimpsons #newyork #mediahomeentertainment

A few weeks back, I was in Chicago and fell ass backwards into a retro toy and gaming expo taking place in the ‘burbs. It was here I snapped this picture of a CHILDREN OF THE CORN promo card.

Even sitting faded under all that scratched display glass, I was reminded how goddamned wonderful this one-sheet really was. So much so, that I decided to make it the premier entry in this new category spotlighting horror artwork. I mean, just look at this thing. The menacing scythe. That Armageddon-orange sky. The horrible colored eyes of those shadowy kids hiding in the corn stalks. I could look at this thing all day, folks. They just don’t make ’em like this anymore.

#onesheetwonders #childrenofthecorn #stephenking #chicago

When there’s no more room in hell, the rip-offs will walk the earth.

Also known as: Night of the Zombies, Virus, Cannibal Virus, Zombies A-Poppin’, Zombie 2, Zombie Inferno, Zombie Disco Inferno: Electric Boogaloo, Zombie Creeping Flesh, Undead Combo Meal with Large Fries, Zombies of the Savanna, The Artists Formerly Known as Zombies, and many, many others.

As adults, we pride ourselves on wisdom. Getting through the highs and lows of life gives us insight we can use to offer needed advice to our loved ones and make intelligent decisions. Then, there are decisions like HELL OF THE LIVING DEAD, which we just know are going to be bad for us. That cigarette. That skanky one-night stand in Vegas. Those two packages of Girl Scout cookies that are just sitting there, taunting us. But we can’t resist. 

I originally intended to see this shit carnival one night on cable in 1984 under its US-branded moniker, UNENDING NIGHT OF THE DEADLY FLESH NIBBLERS, but my mum came to her senses and sent me to bed. (Had it not been a school night, I bet I could have pulled it off.) It took me another decade to finally catch it on video, and boy howdy, was it worth the wait. 

The movie almost seems like it was made by actual zombies. Its genius-by-accident mix of inexplicable nudity, bad dialogue, and non-stop, dollar-store gore inadvertently becomes the very definition of ‘guilty pleasure’. From the ripped off Goblin soundtrack to director Bruno Mattei being billed as “Vincent Dawn”, the producers of HELLISH DAY OF THE DISGRUNTLED WHATEVERS use every trick in the book to convince us this maybe, just possibly, could be the work of George A. Romero. 

Needless to say, it’s a total failure, but once you feast your eyes on BURNING HOPPING ZOMBIES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH, you have to admit that these folks packed a lot of irresistible nonsense into 100 minutes of running time. In all honesty, I’ve probably seen this film at least six times, and I still don’t know what happens in it or what the point is! (Off the record: booze and drugs will help, so be sure to have a lot nearby before you press play.)

Just like that greasy chili burger you have after four oyster shooters, watching DAWNING SCREAMING ZOMBIES ON SAFARI is not going to be one of the best choices you’ll make in this lifetime. But sometimes, you just have to do it. 

#unclean&unseen #hellofthelivingdead #nightofthezombies #vincentdawn #brunomattei #georgeromero #zombies

Even 25 years after its release, THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT remains one of the most divisive horror films in history. Some moviegoers applauded its keen marketing attack and lo-fi scares, while others saw it as a nausea-inducing shakycam bore.

Over the years, I’m sure fans and detractors alike have wondered what happened to the film’s stars, Heather Donahue, Joshua Leonard, and Michael C. Williams. Well, it seems that they were very candid with Variety lately, outlining some contract fuckery that transpired all those years ago. Judging from the comments sections on all the AP reprints across the internet this past weekend, this is shaping up to be as divisive a story as the original film itself.

Make up your own mind by checking out Variety’s original story here.

#horrorhappenings #theblairwitchproject #25thanniversary #heatherdonahue #joshualeonard #michaelcwilliams #variety

Meeting a genre pioneer ain’t easy, especially when you have no idea what he looks like.

With many of his films seeming to be a whacky crash-up of monster movies and black-comedy slapstick, it’s fitting the New Jersey-born Joe Dante started out with working for Roger Corman at New World Pictures. Even some of the director’s earliest works such as PIRANHA (1978) and THE HOWLING (1981) align perfectly with Corman’s zesty, low-budget take on drive-in perfection. 

Turning some tidy profits by the early 1980s, Dante earned enough box office clout to garner notice from Warner Bros. First, he gave a ghastly new spin to “It’s A Good Life” for TWILIGHT ZONE: THE MOVIE (1983) before the studio offered him the plum chance to finally command a bigger budget. The result was GREMLINS (1984), an out-of-the-box summer blockbuster that made everyone (even yours truly) suddenly decide they needed a mogwai in their lives–and yes, I still have mine.

I know a lot of younger people won’t get this, but there was a time when we as moviegoers had no idea what directors looked like. You’d read articles in newspapers or magazines about an exciting new genre film but never once catch a glimpse of anyone outside the principal actors. Keeping that in mind, you can understand my surprise when I met Joe Dante by accident. 

Let me explain. 

In the late 80’s, I was a gawky teen attending my first horror convention. It was like Disneyland for disenfranchised nerds so, naturally, I was in my element and totally in awe of everything. One of the first stops I made was at a table that was reserved for Gary Brandner, author of “The Howling”. Having seen the film, I thought Brandner would be a neat person to meet. Soon after, a man sat down at the table and, with not a single other nerd in sight, I was able to easily stroll up and ask for an autograph. He was very kind and asked my name before jotting for me “To Dylan from Joe Dante” before drawing a quick and surprisingly accurate mogwai beside which he added, “ + Gizmo”. My mouth dropped open when I realized the switcheroo. Not only was this instead the director of THE HOWLING, but also the first time I had ever seen him. 

And with that, Joe Dante inadvertently became the first movie director I ever met. Not a bad start, eh? 

#horrorhonorrole #joedante #garybrandner #gremlins #thehowling #piranha #rogercorman #newjersey #newworldpictures #warnerbros